Summer’s exciting and spontaneous – but there’s something very comforting about a return to routine. When September rolls around, traditions that had given way to the vagaries of summer can start up again. It’s time to get cozy and settle in.
What are the ingredients for a warm and wonderful family ritual? It’s a relaxed, unpressured time just to be together.
There are good smells – whether it’s bread in the oven or fall leaves on the trail. There are comfortable sounds – music, the quiet of looking through a telescope at the night sky, the sound of footsteps through the woods… It’s a time to talk – or sink into companionable silence together.
The time-honored Sunday brunch combines all the ingredients – cozy togetherness; the smells of coffee, coffee cake in the oven, maple syrup; the sound of the newspaper rustling. Here are some embellishments that etch Sundays fondly in children’s hearts:
- “Just me and Dad” driving to buy the Sunday paper from the man on the corner.
- Visiting the bagel shop before everyone else is up – and getting to choose from 15 varieties.
- Sharing a comic or humor column at the table.
- Doing today’s word scramble together – in teams, if younger children are playing.
- Simple comfort food (my family’s favorites: eggs scrambled with sweet red peppers and Swiss cheese; apple cinnamon coffee cake; bacon) with no pressure to “take two bites of each.” Instead of requiring everyone to stay until the last bite is taken, create an atmosphere for lingering – quietly over books and newspapers or conversationally, a chance to share noteworthy things you’ve each read or created during the week.
If brunch is not your thing, create traditions that fit your family and your schedules; things that become part of the fabric of your life together. There’s no reason you have to bring the whole family together to have something meaningful. In fact, trying to force “togetherness time” stands to create additional pressure and stress.
So if your kids are going through a phase of constant competition with each other, try creating some special things to do on a regular basis with each child – like staying up late to watch Mystery Science Theater 3000 reruns with Dad.
©2008 Beech Acres Parenting Center; www.beechacres.org
