Love of a Pet Prepares Kids for Life
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I’ll bet you can remember the moment you first locked eyes with a beloved pet.
I remember presenting our children with a part-Lab puppy on Valentine’s Day. I had wrapped a huge box in bright red paper, added vents, and moments before the gift was to be given, popped the puppy in with a blanket. When the box was opened, out she jumped – and piddled all over the kitchen floor. There’s a photo of my youngest, then 2, gazing in wonderment at Poppy.
Pets become our children’s wonderful friends – warm balls of fluff who leap with joy at their playful spirits and sometimes soak up their tears. They’re individuals, too, each with its own special charm and quirks.
Maybe it’s part of some greater design that dogs and cats have far shorter life spans than their human friends. Our children see them grow up right alongside themselves. And they see them grow old.
Sharing in the lives of their pets provides poignant lessons for children.
Together, you can watch that squirmy puppy grow into a watch dog whose top priority is the safety of your family.
Together, you can admire the grace and independent nature of a feline.
You can cherish the miracle of puppies being born, the power of maternal instinct.
And together, you can learn to say good-bye.
Help your small child understand that his kitty is very, very old and will someday die. Answer his questions, but don’t add unnecessary information. Avoid using the expression “put to sleep.” It’s scary for kids to confuse sleep with death.
Older children may be ready to understand that we have a sacred contract with our pets. In exchange for allowing us to domesticate them, we promise to take care of them and protect them from suffering.
Protect your children from having to make painful, ethically complex decisions about aging pets, but allow them to grieve. Together – again – have a service of remembrance, create a scrapbook, cry.
Don’t rush to replace a cherished pet. Relationships are not interchangeable; that’s an important lesson in itself.
One day when the sadness has subsided, like a daffodil peeping through the last of winter snow, your children will start to imagine the joy of a new pet.
And so it begins again.
©2008 Beech Acres Parenting Center
